In a new article titled “Must You Marry?”, veteran musician Charly Boy is responding to the comments made by RCCG’s General Overseer, Pastor Adeboye, with regards to cooking abilities in a marriage and praying abilities in a marriage.
Read Charly boy’s post below as culled from his website.
For the past few days, Pastor Adeboye’s advice to youths on marriage has been trending all over the place. The “good pastor” yarns tell me that he is a man suspended in time, between old and new school. Don’t get it twisted; in as much as I flow with his definition of a good woman, from his statement I see that the obvious way to his heart is through his stomach and of cause through prayers. Good, No wahala!
However our amiable Pastor rubs it in when he starts to yarn Akpata, “Marry a warrior, if a girl cannot pray for one hour, don’t marry her. Don’t marry a girl who is lazy, who cannot cook. She needs to know how to do chores and cook because you cannot afford to eat out at all times” Hmmm na wa! Really? Seriously?
So if my wife to be can’t rant, chant, shout and generally carry on as a prayer warrior, praying for a whole hour, the woman doesn’t deserve a wife status. Abi?Oga Pastor, that one na missyarn. Over praying does not make one a better husband or wife, because the world especially Naija is filled with fake people and “fakest” pastors. Does a man having a job guarantee that he will make a good husband? Does a woman knowing how to cook guarantee she will make a good wife? Haba.
Ok I get it, the Nigerian god has an ear infection, so we must shout and pray for hours because that’s the only way he may listen to our prayers, right? I know that a man is supposed to marry a helper and not a cook or a house girl. By the way, is anything wrong with encouraging your young male congregation to learn how to cook and do chores too?“Do not marry a worldly lady” what the heck does that mean? Is it about being materialistic or just being fashionable, looking nice. I guess in your book we can’t be good Christians if we got swag and we are trendy. Judge, not pastor. We must all not look like Deeper Life people to have a personal relationship with God. By the way, if you want to start writing your own commandment you may as well write your own version of the bible for your congregation. Na una way.
Being married should never define a man or a woman. Marriage in a few years anyways, will be out of fashion. Being married is only nice if we are lucky to pick a partner who will be our friend, if not, that maybe hell on earth. All of us must not get married if our threshold for nonsense and garbage is low. The world is obviously changing and we are no longer in the 60s. Who wants to be suffering and smiling? Most importantly marriage should not be a milestone for anyone. Yes o.
Like I always say, it will take two to tango. Marriage only works when partners are determined to make it work. It can never be a merit badge, or a status for happiness. Many of us are enslaved in our myopic mindset that makes a mess out of what should really be a good friendship. So Oga Pastor Adeboye, watch your yarns because a lot of people look up to you, Biko. I don talk my own.